Facing My Fears

Despite feeling a sore throat creeping up in the back of my throat, I decided to accompany my roommate, Chansonette, and some of her friends down to Mt.Baker in Washington State to go snowboarding on Sunday. Since I was overseas for 3 of the past 4 winters, I hadn't been snowboarding for almost 5 years! Hence, I was pretty excited, but also a little nervous....

Winding our way through the trees to Mt.Baker

Getting closer to the top

It turns out that I have a few fears... well, I actually have many fears, but I rarely allow them to surface. I've learned that the quickest way to conquer a fear is to do it. And if necessary, do it again, and again, and again. Sunday morning I chose to spend my day facing 3 of my fears - being cold, falling, and being alone.

The snow-covered trees glistened when the sun was shining through them!

The fear of being cold: most people would laugh it off and think that I just don't like being cold. But no, it's a very real fear. The thought of icy coldness seeping into my bones terrifies me. And even scarier, is the thought of being unable to escape such a situation. So the thought of being stuck on the side of a mountain all day long with no way to warm up is pretty frightening. As a result, I packed a whole backpack full of extra warm and dry clothes (that I didn't end up using) just in case I got the slightest bit cold. I don't know if I'll ever fully conquer the fear of being cold, but at least I know how to guard myself against it!

The mid-morning sun shining over the mountain

Cold or not, it's beautiful!

The fear of falling*: this fear is pretty much unavoidable with snowboarding. Perhaps one day I'll get a lot better and I won't spend the majority of the day trying to get up after a countless number of falls, but for now, I'd just be happy not falling every time I try to get off the chair lift! Currently, my fear of falling is hindering my progress because every time I'm supposed to shift my weight to the front edge of my board to order to turn I feel like I'm gonna fall so don't do it. I end up riding my back edge the entire time which is pretty inefficient and it slows me down. I know the theory behind what I'm supposed to do, but the fear of falling (on my face!) is stopping me from actually doing it. This fear is going to require a lot more work in order to conquer it.

This is where I spent a good portion of my time... on my bum!

But I spent some time like this too....

Lastly, the fear of being alone: I knew this would eventually happen. Chansonette was kind enough to hang out with me for a majority of the day, but I knew that near the end of the day she would want to do a few more-challenging runs with her friends. Hence, I had just over an hour in which I was left to fend for myself, on the side of a cold, unfamiliar mountain, hoping against hopes that I wouldn't get lost! I've traveled half-way across the world, I've navigated myself through Bangkok, I've ran a marathon - all of these things, and so many more, alone. But every now and then, the thought of being alone in certain situations is almost more than I can bear. This fear overtook me after only 1 run on my own causing me to end about a half hour earlier and head back to the lodge to wait for the others. But, at least I was able to handle 1 run alone. This too, will require some effort in order to conquer it.

Despite all the fears that I had to face, I had a lot of fun! ......maybe it's because I'm one step closer to conquering some of my fears.

The sun setting on a perfect day...

"Each time we face our fears, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing."

********

*The interesting thing is that I want to go sky-diving! Maybe I'm not afraid of sky-diving because there's a parachute to break my fall.....